January 30, 2024
I guess today is as good as any to begin. I was asked yesterday what am I doing to keep looking so young. After I pointed up to the heavens, she said, “How can God help you do that?” How could I have answered that question in the few minutes I had? That’s when I thought, maybe it’s time to start posting what I have written about my journey through life. I have learned that we need to balance body, mind, soul, and spirit. They are all gifts from the Creator and we have one life to do it in. What lies beyond is not my concern right now. How can we be the best of who we were created to be and that is a journey.
We are all on a journey. Some have little impact on people, some a lot, and some none. I have always wanted to make a large impact on people but that is not in my hands; it’s in God’s.
I invite you to come with me on my journey. My desire is that my story will touch you at the soul level.
I have never been given the opportunity for much fanfare in my life. I guess that this is what has prepared me to fulfill my purpose, my destiny. I have always felt a strong sense of destiny, of purpose, small as it may be in comparison to people like the President of the United States, but it is mine, nonetheless. I remember my first ballet recital. I was chosen as the lead duck. I have had many circumstances where I was the lead duck whether I wanted it or not. On the morning of the concert, my mother told me that I had to have my tonsils out. No discussion. No apology. I never found out who replaced me as lead duck and I always wondered if the ballet was ruined.
No one came to my first piano recital. No one came to my high school graduation. I never graduated from university because three days before I was to write my final exams, a friend convinced me to accept a job instead… so no one came to my graduation either. Once I felt that I might have some sort of fanfare; it was when my job at DPM Financial Planning Group with Brian Belanger came to an end. I remember going to the goodbye party of another assistant who was leaving to start her own business…a gift from her parents. When it came to my goodbye, Brian called me into his office after working for him for 12 years and making him one of the highest earners in his company. He said, I’m truly sorry but I need to let you go because I am closing my practice. I knew that he was ill but I guess I didn’t admit to myself how bad it was. I said, “When?”; he said, “Now!.” His head hung low as he said, “And please leave the car.” I was relieved and responded, “This must be the hardest thing you have ever had to do.” “Yes”, he said quietly. I packed a box of my belongings, called a friend who picked me up and that was that. No one waved goodbye as I left out the front door. No fanfare.
None of this was to evoke a pity party for me; I’m just looking at it all objectively because I realize today that these situations were the training grounds for where I am today. At 76 years of age, the work I do now (which I consider my purpose) requires me to not look for fanfare but to live my journey one day at a time. I think that is how I have always lived my life.
Every day I listen to discussions on social media by people who postulate about the solutions they have found to the many ailments that plague humanity …women’s rights, gender issues, how to combat the increase of sickness, our dwindling economy, how to protect ourselves from the coming depression caused those who think that they have the solution for what ails the world (overpopulation), environmental issues, greedy politicians, end-time prophesies and on and on. Everyone has an opinion on how we can save ourselves from impending doom. The media has been bought and fear abounds… so how can we glean any truth amidst it all?
Over 40 years ago, I can remember standing outside a cinema in the middle of the day in Vancouver, after watching the movie, Platoon. I threw my arms into the air and cried out to anyone up there who could hear me: “Use me”. I was in my 30s. The pain of the world reflected the deep pain within my soul. There would be other days when I would raise my arms to the heavens crying out to be heard…and amazingly enough, each time I was heard. The answer to the ailments of this world is simple but we are lost in the forest for the trees.
Until this moment the urgency to find the truth has not left me. I hesitate to write my story because I ask myself: Who would want to hear it? I haven’t written a doctoral thesis on any subject at university; I have no credentials that would garner adulation; I’m not a billionaire or even a millionaire who can afford to draw the attention of the public; I’m not a beauty who turns heads, but then I remember that the Creator of the Universe knows my name; He called me for a special purpose and that is enough for me. After most of my life in search of answers, I believe I found some.
Whether we believe in a Creator or not, the fact is that He chose the simplest of people (at least three million most of whom had been slaves) to whom to speak at the base of Mount Sinai. He handed them (named a chosen group of people), the only words that humanity would ever need to live in peace and harmony on this gift of a planet – the Ten Commandments and gave them the mandate to bring them, His moral code to the rest of the nations. He is the One who saw my raised arms; He heard the deep cry in my soul and today He gives me the right to speak.
But this is the end of my story so I’d like to start at the beginning…and by the way, I’m still the lead duck!